It looks like eating your vegetables and cleaning your room are important on both sides of the Atlantic. :)

It seems that the French emphasized politeness, while the Americans stressed obedience.  I don't know if this difference is very significant; I would probably include being polite as a sub-set of obeying my parents wishes.  However, I also think the stereotypes imply that French/European children are more polite than their American counterparts.

Respect is very important in both cultures, as is listening to your parents. However, the Americans seem to also believe in the importance of standing up for yourself and your own ideas, which the French responses don't mention much of.

I think standing up for yourself and your own ideas is a good trait to have, but doesn't neccesarily meet the definition of "well-behaved", which tends to imply following orders, and doing as you're expected to.

I think it's weird that standing up for yourself and having your own ideas is considered "well-behaved." I always thought being well-behaved entailed being obiedient and polite and knowing what to say and when to say it. Having your own ideas generally means going against the norm and stepping out, which is normally unpolite and disrespectful in most cases.

Quand vous parlez de défendre ses opinions et bien placer sa personnalité, ça ne veut pas dire que ce n'est pas important dans les familles françaises, mais seulement on ne le mentionne pas parceque cela va de soit et que tout dépend de la manière de le faire!

les enfants peuvent se démarquer sans être impolis ou mal élevé! les parents veillent beaucoup à ça aussi!

Je vous que la plupart des gens soulignent la politesse ou l'obéissance des enfants comme marque de leur caractère "bien élevé". Mais j'ai remarqué qu'une fois chez les américains et une fois chez les français, le fait d'être ouvert à l'autre et d'être bien dans sa peau était aussi mentionné. Et il est vrai que l'éducation des parents permet de transmettre ces bonnes dispositions aux enfants.

Je pense que, spontanément, j'aurais aussi écrit quelque chose en rapport avec la politesse ou l'obéissance (je n'ai pas participé au début de l'expérience, quand il s'agissait de finir les phrases), et je tenais à dire aux personnes capables de s'éloigner de tels stéréotypes que je leur tenais un certain respect ! 

I agree with Insaf-- I think that a well-behaved child shows respect for others and is polite.  This does not prevent him from expressing his opinions but prescribes how he goes about doing it.

Individuality and expressing one's opinion are an important part of American culture, but I think sometimes the concept of politeness gets lost in the rush to express ourselves (myself included, I'm sure).

En français, "être bien élevé" est une expression idiomatique : cela fait sans doute plus penser à une éducation rigide, stricte, un peu désuette, pas loin de la caricature de l'enfant sage comme une image. Cela ne fait pas référence au bien-être, au développement  de l'enfant, mais à un code de manières.

@ Flo: being "well-behaved" in english  to me also brings up an image of somewhat old-fashioned manners and strictness. There is an old phrase "seen and not heard" which was often used to describe a well-behaved child. I think we have moved away from that a bit but still focus on the very polite aspect. I think in the US "well-behaved" only hints at child development, in that parents should raise a well-behaved child. 

I agree with you, Flo. "Well behaved" isn't synonymous with child development. Similar to what Amanda said, good behavior could be a result of a good upbringing but they are not really the same thing. A child could be "well behaved" regardless of his or her upbringing.

I expected all answers to be the stereotypical notion of a well-behaved child that Flo mentioned. However, the allusion to voicing your own opinions on the American side surprised me. On the French side, 2 answers surprised me, including "fait une différence en classe" and "est vif, spontané". Is making a difference in class or being spontaneous reasons why a child may be labeled "well-behaved"?

As an American with Puerto Rican parents, I think my childhood experience is more similar to what we discussed in class is the French point of view. I grew up in a very Puerto Rican household where the children are representative of the parents. If I left my house wearing mismatched clothes or if I made a scene in public, my parents (especially my mother) saw it as a failing on her part. I'm not sure if this is true for all Puerto Rican families or just mine, but based on our discussion in class, this is pretty similar to the French way of raising a child.

I wonder how these perspectives came about? Also, does this perspective extend beyond these two examples? 

My mother was born in the U.S. and had a strict Catholic upbringing.  She applied a lot of aspects of this (not corporal punishment) when raising us.  We knew exactly what was expected and what the consequences for misbehavior were.  While she was embarassed if we misbehaved in public, she viewed misbehavior as our failing less so than hers.  I think this came from the fact that she was raised in this very strict environment and knew what was expected in the Catholic schools for children of different ages.

My father and his family come from Ukraine and they took our misbehavior much more personally, like Paula mentioned. 

I wonder if this dichotomy is common for people whose parents are from different cultures?

That is an interesting point, Christy. If I do something wrong, it's more of a "what is wrong with you" rather than a "what did I do wrong".