A good parent ...

Un bon parent ...

  • A good parent is also a good friend, a good parent gives positive advice
  • always supports their child's decisions but also offers guidance when helpful and/or needed, gently teaches their child how to be a good human being
  • cares.
  • disciplines their child, teaches good principles, listens to what their child needs
  • encourages their child to make their own choices and mistakes, guides them when they need help, and loves without restrictions.
  • helps form their child into a good person.
  • helps their children.
    cares about their children.
  • is loving and responsible; provides.
  • is one that strives to see their children do better than them, is my mother
  • is there for their child.
  • knows how to listen, cares
  • loves, cares, sacrifices.
  • loves their child, wants the best for their children
  • loves their children, is affectionate, puts their own needs second.
  • loves their children, teaches their children how to be successful
  • loves their children unconditionally
  • loves their children unconditionally, supports them, encourages them to be themselves
  • loves unconditionally, shows tough love, is stern but clear and always forgiving
  • respects their child's decisions, teaches about compassion and responsibility
  • shows their children love. , provide for their children.
  • supports their children, teaches their children and helps them grow, provides for their children
  • takes care of their child, loves their child, is a good role model for their child.
  • accepte ses enfants comme ils sont.
  • accompagne ses enfants dans leur évolution.
  • aime ses enfant, ne cède pas tout à ses enfants
  • est celui qui transmet de l'amour et du soutien pour ses fils, est celui qui ne gâte pas trop ses enfants, est celui qui veille à créer un environnement propice à l'éducation de ses enfants
  • est là pour ses enfants,
  • est un ami, est compréhensible, est un support
  • est un parent aimant
  • est un parent présent et aimant.
  • est à l'écoute de ses enfants.
  • est à l'écoute de son enfant.
  • guide et soutient ses enfants.
  • mène à un bon enfant
  • participe à l'éducation de ses enfants
  • s'occupe bien de ses enfants
  • s'occupe correctement de son foyer.
  • soutient ses enfants, quelque soit la situation.
  • suit son enfant, l'aide à avancer et lui inculque au mieux ce que ses propres parents lui ont eux-mêmes enseigné.
  • était un bon enfant , est rare de nos jour

Discussion

Both responses are very similar. There is a lot of overlap of words used on both sides, such as love, support, etc. I think that the Americans and the French both believe that a good parent is a loving parent. What I want to know though is “a good parent” generically used to refer to both parents, or your favorite of the two? Does a “good” dad and “not so good” mom refer to “good parents” or is it mutually exclusive?

Americans seem to emphasize the idea of unconditional love, but this idea is not very present on the French side. Also, Americans seem to place a lot of importance on “independence” and the idea that children should be free to make their own mistakes and to be their own people. Perhaps French parents play a more “active” role in their children’s lives than American parents do? It seems that French parents are seen as “good” when they can “be there” for their children and when they can guide their children, whereas on the American side there is much more emphasis on intangible emotions such as love, support, etc.

A question: the word “education” seems only to appear on the French side. Does this refer to moral education or education related to schoolwork when children are young?

It seemed to me that the Americans seem to focus on the importance of parents teaching their children how to be successful and how to be their own people, while the French focused on the importance of the presence of parents in their childrens’ lives. As @mhk pointed out, education appears only on the French side, but it seemed to me that the Americans focused more on parents as teachers. It is possible that in France, children learn a lot of early life lessons in school and their parents focus on supporting their children in their pursuits and their educations.

What are the most important values for children to learn from their parents?

Je pense que les enfants sont les miroirs de ses parents, dans le sens ou les enfants les bien élevés découlent (souvent) des bons parents.
Les valeurs les plus importantes pour les enfants à apprendre de leurs parents sont : la sincérité, l’amour et la paix , faire de son mieux, le patriotisme …

pour mhk :
l’éducation en français peut signifier soit l’apprentissage de l’école soit aussi les valeurs et les idées que les parents passent à leurs enfants.
Et je pense que le mot éducation en anglais, signifie que le premier sens.
La question qui me m’intrigue, si nous sommes tous d’accord qu’un bon parent est celui qui donne de l’attention, de l’amour et le support pour ses enfants, comment peut-on faire ces bons parents ?

Pour erbri :
Je pense que ce qu’on doit faire passer à nos enfants, et surtout le vrai esprit critique et analytique des phénomènes et actualités.
Si un enfant a eu cette capacité, il sera, automatiquement, indépendant de ses parents et il sera capable de réfléchir et faire la distinction entre ce qui est bien et mal.
entre autre, un enfant possédant ce caractère sera capable de comprendre qu’il doit bien travailler pour gagner sa vie et être utile dans sa société pour que son pays soit plus développé et plus fort…

@jlampart: Je pense pour qu’un enfant puisse être élevé dans de bonnes conditions, il faut cela soit fait par de bons parents, il faut que le père et la mère soient considérés comme un tous, ils peuvent par exemple se compléter dans l’éducation des enfants. Séparément, ils peuvent être considérés comme des parents moyens, mais s’il arrive à trouver un équilibre, cela est suffisant.

@Jlampart, pour moi, “good parents” veut dire “good Dad” et “good Mom” à la fois. Sinon, j’ai constaté que les étudiants américains ont beaucoup mentionné l’amour inconditionnel. Or je pense que l’amour des parents est toujours inconditionnel, est ce qu’il existe des parents dont l’amour envers leurs enfants est conditionné par leurs actions/attitudes ?

@hanine, I think it is possible for parents who do not love their children unconditionally to exist, but it is not the mark of a good parent to do so. I think it is probably more likely for children to feel like their parents do not love them unconditionally and to feel like they must continually impress their parents to win more love.

Both sides seemed very similar to me. However one thing stood out to me on the French side - someone mentioned “is a friend”. I know some people who have a sort of relationship with their parents where it’s like they’re best friends with their mom or something, but I feel like parents in general should be separate from the “friends” category because they each fulfill separate rolls in a person’s life. I suppose that could also just be me and not reflect American culture in general, but what is your opinion on parents being like a friend to their children?

@ laika: It’s a very complicated issue - I think it’s about half and half in the US. Personally, my mother always told me that she is a friend above anything else, and I do consider her a “best friend” (separate from my same-age best friends, of course). However, I do know many people in America who say that it feels odd to think of their parents as friends.

To the French students: What is the situation in France? Are people often “friends” with their parents?

I noticed that the idea of patriotism and making a stronger country came up twice. Do you think being a good French (or American) citizen is important to being a good parent? How do you see these ideas overlapping?

It appears that the American definition of a good parent relates to an emotionally focused approach to parenting, making sure that their children are emotionally stable. Meanwhile the French definition appears to be more focused on the overall development. So for the French a good parent raises a fellow member of their community and the American good parent just makes sure their children are healthy.

I noticed that it seems that a good parent to American students has a sense of sacrifice, do the French not see parenting as a sacrifice or is it kind of assumed?

Personnellement, je pense que les parents doivent changer de rôle selon la situation, il doivent être parfois stricts, et d’autres fois “friends”.
@aokello, Certes, les parents font beaucoup des sarcrifices pour le bien de leurs enfants, mais c’est un sacrifice choisi et doit donc être assumé.

@elemcy: Bien qu’aucune réponse côté français n’aie fait référence au patriotisme, je pense que c’est implicitement lié à l’éducation de manière générale. De bons parents cherchent à apprendre à leurs enfants comme bien se comporter en société dans la vie de tous les jours, pour ne pas être vulgaires, grossiers, etc., envers les autres, et ainsi s’intégrer correctement dans une communauté quelconque. Il n’est pas rare d’ailleurs, quand on rencontre un enfant qui se comporte mal, de rejeter la faute sur les parents, et de critiquer la manière dont ils l’ont éduqué. D’autre part, si un enfant est mal éduqué à la base, quand il aura grandi, il sera un peu plus difficile par la suite de lui faire oublier ses mauvaises manières (ces automatismes qu’il a acquis et répété en grandissant), et cela lui sera sans doute fatal quand il voudra trouver un emploi et réussir sa carrière.
Une réponse m’a tout de même intrigué : “A good parent puts their own needs second”. Pensez-vous qu’un parent doit vraiment tout donner / “se sacrifier” complètement pour son enfant ?

The French seem to have a more positive connotation associated with the American Dream, while the Americans seem to think that it cannot always be reached. The French are more optimistic about it. Some Americans associate it with success and opportunity, while others view it as a silly unrealistic, “white house, picket fence” stereotypical dream.
It can be very hard for new immigrants and impoverished citizens to find a high paying job in American. This means that the American Dream is not possible for everyone, or so it may seem to those who witness this firsthand. However, for those who consider America as a potential place to move to, this is not the case. It is seen as a country where you can succeed if put in work and try to do well. And for many in America, this is the case.
If you could “try out” the American Dream and live in the United States for several years, would you? If not, what makes you most apprehensive about moving to America? If so, what would you expect to find when you moved here? Do you think that it would be easy to integrate into the culture? To find a stable job? Etc.?

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