You find out that your best friend has been lying to you about someone or something that is important to you.

Vous découvrez que votre meilleur/e ami/e vous ment à propos de quelqu'un ou d'une affaire qui vous tient à coeur.

Approach the friend and find out why he has been lying to me.
be sad and tell them so
deal with the situation by talking
Get very upset. Probably wouldn't talk to him for a few days.
I have a serious discussion with him as to how I was hurt by his actions, and I'll assume he would listen thoughtfully to me and apologize.
I let him know about it, but don't necessarily renounce the friendship.
I shrug and mentally move on.
I talk to him and emphatically explain why he's no longer my friend
I talk to him/her to find out why
I would be hurt.
I would be very upset, and depending on the situation, would possibly go as far as breaking off the friendship, at least for a while.
I would become extremely furious and not talk to them for a while.
I would feel hurt and confront them about it and try to work it out.
I would tell my best friend that it will be difficult to trust him/her in the future. The trust would have to be rebuilt.
I'd be hurt and I'd confront her letting her know that I know the truth
I'd probably be shocked at first, feel betrayed, and get extremely mad at them.
I'd tell them we need to talk, close the door, and be like, what the hell?, and make them explain.

alors ce n est plus une amie car je ne concoit pas le mensonge
il y a sans doute une bonne raison à cela.
J'essaie de comprendre ses raisons : une discussion menée avec tact est le meilleur moyen.
je demande une expliquation et je suis prête à mettre fin à cette amitié
Je lui demande des explications
je lui demande des explications (peut être voulait-elle me protéger), sinon elle peut perdre ma confiance
je lui demande des explications.
Je lui demande ses raisons et il ne s'en tirera pas facilement.
je lui demande une explication, et vois par la suite
je pardonne mais je n oublie pas , je ne lui ferai confiance que trés rarement, cela m attriste
je parle avec il/elle pour mettre les choses bien au point....
Je suis déçu et le lui fait savoir.
je suis trés dessus qu'il ou elle ne m'en parle pas, mais il ou elle a peux etre ses raisons, il ou elle veux peux etre me proté l'espere
je vais aller parler avec lui pour connaître ses raisons
je vais le voir et je lui demande des explications


American Values

It was really interesting for me to see that the Americans reacted much more strongly to this situation than the French. Many of the Americans said that they would try to sue their boss and several also said that they would quit. On the French side, the reactions seemed much more mild. No one said they would quit, and I don't think many people even said that they would become angry. I think one of the reasons for this apparent difference comes from the intrinsic value of honesty in American society. You can definitely see a parallel in some of the other situations (best friend lying to you, a student cheating on an exam) that honesty is very, very important to Americans. The thought of someone going behind your back and reading your email is very repulsive for us because it violates a fundamental trust that we have in others. Thus, when we find out someone is being dishonest, the consequences are rather dire. This is really apparent when it comes to American politics. As soon as a politician lies about something, their career comes to an end. I was wondering, what is the value of honesty in France? Are the reactions as drastic as they are in America? How would the French public react if, for example, the president were to lie about something?


It seems to me that the concept of revenge is a big theme on the French side. For example, in this case, several French responses to this situation of your boss reading your email was "I would do the same thing to him and read his email." This also seemed to be the case in the bank situation: the teller addresses you by your first name, several responses were "I would call him by his first name and "tutoie" him as well." And then again, the parallel comes up in the cheating situation: you see someone cheating on an exam, a few French students said, "then I would cheat off of him." This definitely seems like a recurring theme, which doesn't come up very often on the American side. I was wondering, is this reaction perhaps intrinsic to the French sense of justice?


I think part of the reason why the American's had such a stong reaction to this situation is that the issue of information and privacy is a relatively new controversy in our society. It has a lot of different variations. One is employers and email, and the debate over whether they have a right to this information about their employees. There is also the issue of genetic testing privacy, and whether that should be kept secret or not, as it very easily could lead to discrimination against those that have a genetic disorder. The problem of cookies and how much information they gather about you and whether they sell it to other companies (who then have a better idea of which websites you go to, and can therefore tailor their advertising campaign appropriately). It's a big issue, and I think a lot of people here are really sensitive to it.

Fuzzy reactions

It seems the French simply stated their expected reactions. The Americans mostly added what their feelings would be. I do not think this has anything to do with a tendency (or lack of) to display emotions (or does it?). Could it be that you French students are not disposed to considering email as personal?